Only let to more humiliation and me making a huge ass out of myself. I mean I was on a massive caffiene high, but now I have the rep. for being nuts. Back in my shell, fuck being sociable. Ohh yeah, no more coffee! I am going to get help.

Not again...

Ya again. It didn't work! I blew it! Don't worry, I won't bitch as much this time, I will try to keep it more to myself. Ohh, and since I will be insured as of midnight, I am going to get help.

What's wrong with being nuts? In case you haven't noticed, we're all pretty fucked up.

Around here, alot is wrong with it. I am now a laughing stock and considered nuts. If you ever wondered why I appear so normal but am alone etc, there is your reason. It came out to me very clearly why I am alone over the past week. I really feel I was misdiagnosed as a kid and if I was, that means I have been given the wrong meds my entire life. I will be seeing a specialist very soon and will be retested.

Ohh and before Tony and the macho crew come in here....

Check your pm's!

I think in the end, it was a good lesson on society and how some people fit and some simply don't.

Why do you care so much what other people think??

www.justacoach.com I told you to try calling him Rob...

Because if I could get accepted into something socially, it would be a massive step foward into not being alone etc... My FTW attitude a few years back only made it worse.


It is ok, simply because I am going to see a specialist. If I wasn't at this point, I would call him.

what kind of specialist Rob?

Not exactly sure, but it will be someone who deals with mental health. First I am going to my doctors Thursday Night and telling him I need it. A specialist who could probably re-diagnose me.

How about one that deals with guys that are pussies ???

What the hell is that DT?

:lmao: hey, where did that smiley go!

Shit, I left my DT translator in the other room. I don't want to have to get up and get it.

how about leaving Rob alone?

--tx

He can't help it. Don't worry, once Chuck makes a post, he will get distracted.

One, ONE incoherent sentance AH AH AH

TWO TWO...

Maybe you can double book your appointment with the specialist and bring DT along??

That could help! Having a pic of Chuck with darts in it may not be very good!

El Nino is Spanish for the NINO!

Rob,

Ask the specialist if he is a cognitive therapist. That's most likely what you need. Also, pick up this book: http://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Handboo...s/dp/0452281326

It is a great complement to therapy.

Your post is a classic example of some of this sort of thinking:

http://members.tripod.com/AnneLB/depcog2.htm

The 10 Forms of Twisted Thinking
Dr. Burns has documented 10 types of distorted thinking. How many of these depressing emotional traps have you fallen into?

All-or-Nothing Thinking. You see things as black or white. If you're not perfect, you're a total failure. You make one mistake at work, and decide you're going to be fired. You get a B on a test, and it's the end of the world. Your husband reprimands you for not checking the oil when you got gas, and you decide he doesn't love you.

"Like many people, I was a perfectionist," Dr. Burns explains. "Either I was terrific, or I was nothing. Either I pleased my boss, spouse, parents, or friends, or else I was good for nothing. It made me terribly anxious, and I spent a good deal of my life ashamed of myself because, of course, I wasn't perfect."

Labeling. An extension of all-or-nothing thinking. You make a mistake, but instead of thinking I made a mistake, you label yourself: I'm a jerk. Your girlfriend breaks up with you, but instead of thinking she doesn't love me, you decide: I'm unlovable.

Dr. Sisti felt himself slipping into labeling during a six-hour professional licensing exam. When he came to a section he found difficult, his first thought was: This is really tough. I must be an idiot. "But then I took a deep breath, and realized that I'd completed other sections that weren't so hard, and that everyone else in the room was probably having as tough a time as I was."

Over-generalization. The tip-offs are the use of the words "always" or "never." You drop something and think: I'm always so clumsy. You make a mistake and think: I'll never get it right.

Mental Filtering. In complicated situations that involve both positive and negative elements, you dwell on the latter. Your mother clearly enjoys the dinner party you throw in her honor, but comments that the cake was a bit dry. You filter out all her positive comments and whip yourself for being such a lousy baker.

"As a perfectionist," says Bruce Zahn, M.A., director of psychology and cognitive therapy at Presbyterian Medical Center in Philadelphia, "I sometimes slip into mental filtering. I usually get good feedback on my job and in my personal relationships, but when people give me minor criticism, I'm apt to think the worst: They don't love me. They're going to fire me. Then I realize, no, this is a minor criticism, and all I have to do is correct it."

Discounting the Positive. The tip-offs here are the phrases: "That doesn't count," "That wasn't good enough," or "Anyone could have done it." You do well on a test, and think: It doesn't count. Your colleagues praise a presentation, and you think: It wasn't good enough. You win a commendation and think: Anyone could have done it.

Jumping to Conclusions. You assume the worst based on no evidence. In "mind-reading," you decide that another person is reacting negatively to you. Two of your coworkers are chatting at the coffee machine at work, but as you approach, they fall silent. Chances are they'd simply finished their conversation, but you assume they've been criticizing you behind your back. In "fortune-telling," you predict the worst possible outcome. A test is difficult, so you decide you failed. The sky is cloudy before you lawn party, so you decide a thunderstorm must be imminent.

Dr. Sisti slipped into fortune-telling recently when he realized he'd lost his automatic teller machine (ATM) bank card: "My blood pressure shot up as I imagined that I'd lose all my money. Then I thought: What's the worst thing that could happen? Someone might use my card. But no one could--not without my personal identification number. But what if I'd left it in the machine? Then someone could withdraw $250. That would have been a loss, but not a terrible one."

Magnification. You exaggerate the importance of problems, shortcomings, and minor annoyances. Your toilet backs up, and you believe you need your entire plumbing system replaced. You forget to close a window before it rains, and imagine that you'll return to a flooded home. A neighbor's dog tramples a few flowers and you decide your garden is ruined.

Emotional Reasoning. You mistake your emotions for reality. I feel nervous about flying, therefore, it must be dangerous. I feel guilty about forgetting my brother's birthday, therefore, I'm a bad person. I feel lonely, therefore, I must not be good company.

"Should" and "Shouldn't" Statements. You play well in the company volleyball tournament, but miss one shot and berate yourself: I should have made that shot. I shouldn't have missed. You eat a donut and think: I shouldn't have done that. I should lose 10 pounds. Other self-demanding tip-offs include: "must," "ought to," and "have to."

Personalizing the Blame. You hold yourself personally responsible for things beyond your control. Your child misbehaves at school and you think: I'm a bad mother.

"Occasionally, I've been late for an appointment because of heavy traffic," Dr. Sisti says, "and I've felt tempted to personalize it, as in: I must be irresponsible. But then I've realized that I'd allowed what should have been enough time, and that the traffic jam is beyond my control. People understand if you get stuck in traffic. It happens to everyone."

it's :lmao smiley:....but of course altogether.

I think El-Nino is forming quite strongly!

JamieO, very interesting read. I will mention it Thursday night as well.

That is a great book Mr. O..it is the gold standard for modern cognitive therapy. I don't know if he has changed the cover..so despite the fact that David Burns looks like a young Mr. Rogers, his book it top notch.

Yeah, he does look like he wants to be your neighbor.

Rob you blind?

In a wheelchair?

All your family dead?


Many have it much worse than you, time to be a man.

That's why I went out and got insurance. Time to solve this myself.

God all fucking mighty ROB

could you be any more of self absorbed pussy?
How fucking dare you...

You live comfortable surburban life with no threats to your life or health BUT more importantly you have a life with No meaning ...

instead you sute there and wallow in your own god dam agony whining like a 16 year Valley gorl having sex for the first time Hoping that someone gives you some sort of approval or recognition

Meanwhiole in the real word there are 300 family members... little abbies and toddlers and kids who never sw their father and monthers again on sept 11...

there are 300 dead american in Iraq 20,000+ soliders who come back and have to live woth No arms or lost a leg oir blinded oir have gone REALLY crazy...

and there are still hundreds of thousands of displaced and homeless folks in or from new orelans 15 months after KATRINA suffering and deeply traumatized and over 1300 dead ...

and your complaint is that No one likes you? Your compliant is that you had too much caffine? you need a new Therapist?

How fucking dare you...



No rob what you need to do is look around get a fucking life and suck it up and find out whats really important

when YOUR perspective changes so will people and how they react around you

HOW DARE YOU BITCH ABOUT EASTERN ALL THE TIME WHEN KATRINA KILLED ALL THOSE PEOPLE AND WITH THE IRAQ SITUATION! You can say that about anything. Thanks for trying though. Your macho approach is noted.

Have you not considered this could be something with medical roots? There are plenty of people that are very successful who suffer from depression or other related disorders.

in that you don't know the details of Rob's life and exactly what he is dealing with, discretion might be the better part of valor. just a word to the wise since you have a number of the facts regarding Rob wrong in this tirade.

the fact that tragedy exists around the globe doesn't mean that the stuff we all deal with day-to-day--marriage problems, problems with children, deaths in the family, serious illnesses both physical and mental--don't also resonate and mean something.

--tx

You know what, both of you need to shut the fuck up. You have no clue what Rob is going through and how tough living with this shit is.

Dave, your a great met and a seem to be a nice person, but really you have no clue what is going on in rob's head. So what if he lives in the Suburbs and has no threats to his life, In his head he does, its a threat that is very real and is extremely frightning.

You and Tony think what about 85% of the population in this country thinks, that people who have depression, anxiety, Panic disorders, etc. are just a bunch of whining babies who do what they do for the purpose of attention. They tell you to "grow up", Get over it, be a man, etc. I'll tell you this: Take your worst fear, maybe losing your wife in a accident or being unable to live without constant help, whatever it maybe. Take that fear and think of how it must feel to live it 24/7/365. Maybe then you can understand what so many others don't.

And if you still think that Rob is doing this for attention or maybe think he could just turn this off like a light-switch, then i have only this to say: GO FUCK YOURSELF.

Thanks for the post, but I kinda expected the normal "crew" to respond like that. I have to face them just like the people who are being nice and respectful. Take the good and the bad together.

Excellent post Trixie. I don't understand how people can just blatantly act like they know how everyone should react to things in their life. DT doesn't walk in Rob's shoes and doesn't live Rob's life. There will always be bad stuff in the world, but this does not mean that each person cannot personally have his own problems and issues to deal with. Everyone is built differently. Rob is looking for a way to better himself and get the proper treatment he feels that he needs. For that I applaud him. There are many people that wallow and never do anything to try and better themselves. If Rob always came on here and whined and never did anything, I would react differently. But, he has taken the step and met some people from the board in person. He is going to a gym and also working. For some of us that is nothing, but for others that is a big step. There may be others on this board who are whiny and never seem to do anything about it, but I don't consider Rob to be one of those people.

Very good post. I don't know Rob, obviously, but I promise you the problems and helplessness he is feeling is real. Years ago, I had a bought with anxiety and panic attacks, and I can tell you that next to losing my parents at a young age, it was the hardest thing I have had to go through. Are there people that have it worse than Rob? I am pretty confident that is true. The fact of the matter is, though, that we are all self-centered, in that the world around us, and our personal problems, are a more daily concern. I would posit that this is not a bad thing, but necessarly to survival.

Furthermore, it is not as simple as saying that in order to solve his problems, Rob just needs to "man up" and end it. Rather, I think it is encouraging that he realizes that something needs to be done about how he feels, etc. It takes a bigger man to admit having these kind of problems than it does to dismiss them with faux machismo.