A couple of times a week, I take over the duty of
giving my kids a bath. There isn't much to it -- wash them, shampoo,
conditioner (for my daughter), and then let them play with their
myriad of bath toys for a while, while I do some house chores.
Lately, however, there have been some complications.
The past couple of times, after I left them in the bath, my
daughter, Hailey, has run out, crying "Joey peed on me!" Yes, my son
has taken up the delightful habit of giving his sister a special
bath of his own. This has led to stern lectures, followed by
emptying the bath, and showering them both down, since it's probably
not the most sanitary act to be bathing in pee-pee.
Last night, I left them to play, and as I was feeding the cats,
Hailey ran out. Quite upset. So upset, in fact, that she was
hyperventilating. I asked her what was wrong, and she couldn't
answer; she just pointed to the bathroom. Dammit, he did it again.
Okay. Enough is enough.
I went into the bathroom, gritting my teeth, ready to put a little
respect/fear into Joey. There he was, sitting there with a little
devious grin. I yelled at him to get out, and started the process of
hurriedly removing the toys and draining the water. I grabbed the
Elmo boat, the Dora The Explorer diver, the Blues Clues swimmer, the
rubber letters, the... what... is... that...
AAAAAGGGHH!!!
At the start of the bath, there was 20 various objects put into the
bath. Now, there was 21. Strike that -- 22. It broke in half after I
had picked it up.
I was instantly reminded of the delicious dinner I had made the
night before -- skirt steak, garlic potatoes, and... buttered
Niblets CORN. Suddenly, it didn't seem so good anymore.
After several minutes of dry-heaving, scraping the filth from under
my fingernails, and hurriedly disinfecting the bathtub (I had 2 wet,
butt-naked kids standing in the kitchen, so I had to rush), I herded
them back in for a quick shower. As I put Joey in, he immediately
started peeing. Ugh. Why me. WHY!
Since my son's potty-training is obviously not going well, I figure
I'll get him a new potty seat in the shape of a bathtub. He should
love that.
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